Who knew The Super Mario Bros. Movie would be such an emotionally loaded experience?
With a plot that follows Mario (voiced by Chris Pratt), Luigi (Charlie Day), and Princess Peach (Anya Taylor-Joy) as they try to save the Mushroom Kingdom from being over taken by Bowser (Jack Black), The Super Mario Bros. Movie feels less like a family-friendly cartoon and more like an animated movie that's aware of its adult audience. Whether that's dropping Easter eggs only people who grew up with a Game Boy will recognize or relishing in the absurdity of Bowser as a half-turtle, half-dragon beast whose only goal in life is to be loved, The Super Mario Bros. Movie recognizes the joy of growing up with Nintendo's universe — and makes sure you remember it too.
While watching the film, I was surprised to feel my heartstrings being tugged. Sure, some of it was simple nostalgia. Most of it was supportive cringing. But, honestly, a lot of it was an urge to scream with glee. From finally getting onscreen moments I've hoped to see since I was a kid to random plot points I could never have imagined, The Super Mario Bros. Movie was a gift I didn't know I needed. Kind of like socks.
So, without further ado, here are all the film's moments that made my inner eight-year-old shriek with joy, sometimes even while my present adult self cringed, while my Nintendo-loving ate up every second.
1. When Bowser throws a mosh pit party.
In between his many attempts to rule the world, Bowser apparently loves hosting his own club night. With flames spewing around the dance floor, and a whole army of Koopas head-banging so hard they just might fall out of their shells, Bowser's officially the crowned king of thrashing.
Of course, someone as angry as Bowser would need a daily mosh pit to blow off steam. The guy is just filled with so much endless rage, scream-singing along to Van Halen is probably the only thing that gets him through his day (he and I have that in common). Although I'm dumbfounded that Jack Black didn't take Bowser's mosh pit scene as an opportunity to perform some Tenacious D, the party is still enviously incredible. My newfound goal in life is to be invited.
2. When we finally meet Mario and Luigi's family.
Walking into The Super Mario Bros. Movie, did I expect to meet Mario and Luigi's parents? No, I absolutely did not. Did I, more pressingly, expect them to be Italian Americans living in Brooklyn? The thought's never crossed my mind. I don't know what expectations I had for Mario and Luigi's family, but I definitely did not think it was going to be this. From everyone having matching mustaches to Mario's dad being one "Mamma mia!" away from offending every Italian American ever, meeting Mario and Luigi's parents was an absolute riot. Plus, apparently even Mario has daddy issues.
3. When Mario trains to Bonnie Tyler's "Holding Out for a Hero."
If I had a dime for every time Bonnie Tyler's "Holding Out for a Hero" was used to incredible effect in an animated film, I'd have two dimes — which isn't a lot, but it's absolutely amazing that it's happened twice. Cultural connoisseurs will remember the track's iconic scene in Shrek 2 (Fairy Godmother hive, please rise), and if you've thought that was the last time you'd ever hear "I need a hero" blasting while a meek cartoon protagonist tries to save the day, think again!
Before battling Bowser, Mario obviously has to have a training sequence. The scene is the ultimate eye candy for any fan of the original games, from infamous obstacle courses to piranha plants, and the cherry on top of its perfect 8-bit homage is Bonnie Tyler's anthem wrapping it all together. My Nintendo-obsessed heart was already screaming at all the mushroom power-ups, and the section of my brain devoted to '80s pop ballads lit up the second I heard the first note. 10/10 scene. No notes. Please give us more Bonnie Tyler serenading ogres and pixelated plumbers.
4. When Donkey Kong does the thing.
I never thought this staple of pop culture would ever become canon in The Super Mario universe, but alas, it has. "It's on like Donkey Kong" is officially Nintendo-approved.
Before brawling with Mario, Donkey Kong (Seth Rogen) proudly bellows the famous catchphrase, which was coined by Ice Cube in the '90s and trademarked by Nintendo(opens in a new tab). Admittedly, I did not know whether to laugh or whole-body cringe at this scene, but I appreciate the nod to culture nonetheless. Honorable mention to Seth Rogen's iconic laugh somehow also becoming a part of Donkey Kong's character.
5. When Bowser serenades a picture of Peach.
The B in Bowser stands for balladeer. Not only is this dragon/turtle hybrid a conqueror, but he's also a performer. In a scene that'll surely bring you close to tears, Bowser beautifully plays a melody on the piano while singing his heart out, the chorus aptly repeating "Peaches, Peaches, Peaches," to a framed picture of Princess Peach. The beast is in love, and he just wants his beauty to hear his song.
Everything about Bowser's serenade was comedic, scream-worthy perfection, from Jack Black's phenomenal vibrato powering through every line to the '80s music video aesthetic elevating the scene into its own piece of art. Here's to hoping "Peaches, Peaches, Peaches" by Bowser drops on Spotify soon — I, for one, will be streaming.
6. When the blue shell somehow gets even worse.
Being blue-shelled right as you're about to reach the finish line in Mario Kart is one of the most soul-crushing experiences ever, and The Super Mario Bros. Movie pays homage to that unmatched feeling of loss in a cool car chase scene. As the gang tries to escape Bowser while racing on Rainbow Road, everyone seems to be almost out of his reach — until a Koopa Troopa decides to wreck havoc with its cerulean weapon of doom.
No words can describe the empathy I felt towards Mario and Donkey Kong as they watched the blue shell hover around them, land right on top of them, and catapult them so far off from the race track not even Lakitu could bring them back. The true enemy in The Super Mario universe has always been the blue shell. It will always be the blue shell. And I'm incredibly thankful for The Super Mario Bros. Movie for recognizing the animosity of this azure carapace filled only with the essence of evil.
7. When Peach keeps saying "my toads."
I never questioned how Peach would address her royal subjects, but I never expected her to call them "my toads." It's so stupidly funny. It screams cool queen trying to get down with her people. And it's such a silly term of endearment, said with so much seriousness, that you can't help but laugh at how right Peach thinks she is by saying it. "My toads." Surely, there's another way to address your people with fondness. How about "my friends" or "my trusted comrades"? Come on Peach, get it together.
8. When some toads tell Mario to go to another castle.
To no one's surprise, The Super Mario Bros. Movie is full of Easter eggs and sweet nods to the games, but this one scene takes the cake for sweetest tribute. When Mario first arrives in the Mushroom Kingdom and heads to Peach's castle, he's told by some toads to head to another castle because the princess isn't there. Anyone who's played the original Super Mario game will recognize the reference.
In the original games, anytime Mario arrived at a castle, he'd undoubtedly find Toad telling him, "Thank you Mario! But our princess is in another castle," right up until the last level. The toads using that same tagline in the movie was a touching tribute that had me yearning for my old Game Boy.
9. When Tanooki Mario, of all characters, saves the day.
As someone who's been repeatedly made fun of for always choosing Tanooki Mario in Mario Kart, I was overjoyed to see him finally getting his flowers. After obtaining the Raccoon Mario power-up, Mario adopts the Tanooki outfit (plus its strength) and uses its many skills to stop Bowser's bullet from destroying the Mushroom Kingdom. Out of all possible Mario variations the movie could have used, I'm thrilled that they went with the fluffiest and cutest Mario, recognizing him as the superhero we all really need — not to mention an excellent, timeless meme.
Tanooki fangirling aside, I didn't expect The Super Mario Bros. Movie to show as many of Mario's variations as it did. Who knows? Maybe we'll get Dr. Mario in the sequel.
10. When Yoshi finally makes his appearance.
Taking some notes from the MCU, The Super Mario Bros. Movie is expanding its universe with a post-credit scene that promises a sequel. Like the memorable sneak peek at Thanos in The Avengers,The Super Mario Bros. Movie has its own big surprise in store — Yoshi's reveal.
The post-credits see Yoshi's egg cracking right before the screen goes black, silencing all skeptics with a subtle confirmation that Mario will be back. Yoshi will be there with him. And we might be getting even more familiar faces in a potential sequel. Fingers crossed Waluigi and Wario will also be there.
The Super Mario Bros. Movie is out in theaters.
